Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
