Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
