Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize