We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
