she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize