For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
