Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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