It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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