At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
