I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
