Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
