i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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