He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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