oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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