my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
His hands were made for my vagina.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Randomize
