I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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