I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
