i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
