something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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