I'm going to jail i love you
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I AM VODKA MAN
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
