i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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