More tranny stories later!
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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