I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
