I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize