We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
