I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize