He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
