So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
i black out too much to be "responsible"
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
