He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
i need some magic done to my vagina
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
