Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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