I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize