how hairy? two words: wookie tits
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
