Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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