i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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