im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
