guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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