The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Who died my cat blue again?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
