I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
