I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
sex in a hospital.. check
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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