We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
i now understand why vodka
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
