I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
