I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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