Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize