Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
