But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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