Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
