he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
