at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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