we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
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