Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Randomize
